I wanna be in the energy, not with the enemy

In the spirit of TB, Tanaudel is Teh Kewlz!! She sent me a beautiful copy (I hope, a copy) of a picture she did some months ago that I adored. She also included a little desk calendar that features the Australian Outback! It was so sweet of her and I have no idea how to thank her.

I did a home practice on Sunday after I wrote this post, and it was extraordinary. I put together a nearly-hourlong mix of intense music for it, which I just threw together quickly but which turned out to seriously impact the practice. In a good way. A sampling of the songs: “The Beginning is the End is the Beginning” by the Pumpkins* (that song that was in the Watchmen trailer, the one that gave me shivers), “Unnatural Selection” by Muse, and – seriously – “A Place for My Head” by Linkin Park. That was the most incredible song of the practice, actually; I did two sun salutation Bs to it, slowly, measuredly, and the energy in my hands was so intense that I was clutching the mat while I lowered into chaturanga. My limbs were trembling with it, with what the song gave me. There’s so little hard-hard rock that I enjoy, but that which I do enjoy allows me to transcend my reality entirely.

Little R-rated moment here: I don’t know if I did too many hip openers during the practice or what, but I wound up with some distinctly sexual energy while I was on the mat. Had BF gotten home at the right moment he would have been attacked. By the time he did get home, I had calmed down a lot, but we still fell asleep that night with dopey grins.

*Meaningless music sidebar: I’ve never really liked the Smashing Pumpkins, although they were one of the most prominent bands during my generation’s growing-up. For me, it’s maybe one song in fifteen where I think they get it just right, where Billy Corgan’s horrible voice is in exactly the right place, where the songwriting is totally without frayed edges or holes, and it’s those songs that I can actually enjoy. There are so few, though, compared to their catalog on the whole. “Ava Adore”, “Tonight Tonight”, “Bullet with Butterfly Wings” (in its own way), and “Beginning” are the only ones I can think of at the moment.

Last night I was supposed to stop by home, pick up the flyers I printed out for my Sunday class, and proceed to Annapolis to put up the flyers and take Paul’s class. But BF was home (he’s off this week – his company, intelligently, always closes between Christmas and New Year’s), and he’d just finished making dinner, and I hadn’t really wanted to take class anyway, so I just stayed. And we had such a nice evening together, with all this time to spend since he was home two hours before he usually gets home. It was wonderful. Tonight I’ll have to do the flyer thing and go to Target for sundries, and I’m going to go right after work so I don’t get distracted by BF and his awesome self again.

Next week the one-credit massage course at AACC starts. It’s on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday from 6 PM to 8:30. I think it runs for two weeks like that, which means I’ll have two pretty intense weeks. Still, I look forward to it, to what I’ll learn from it. I’m really glad I decided to go ahead and do it, despite all the driving and time and so on.

Going back to work after a few days away, I always do this sort of awful “oh…yeah. Yick.” This job sucks. I’ve worked at jobs where the company was corrupt or sleazy, jobs where I was totally taken advantage of, and jobs where the work was just horrible, so I know that this really isn’t that bad in the scheme of things. But it’s still essentially a sucky job, and I wish it was not what I did for 40 hours a week.

Does anyone know how to distinguish junk undereye creams from the real thing? I have deep dark circles, and I’ve tried hydrating, a good diet, tons of sleep, and so on. I’m ready to try ridiculously expensive eye creams now, but I don’t know how to figure out what’s worth the money and what’s not. I don’t really care about fine lines and wrinkles, and I don’t have any puffiness. Suggestions encouraged!

I found 2009 a weird and challenging year, even if a number of my personal goals came to pass. I’m glad it’s winding to a close this week.